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Bad Barber

Once it’s off, it’s off.

You’re the new barber in the West Village. Big-headed customers mumble what they want in a wah-wah trombone voice, and you cut real-looking hair with clippers, shears and a straight razor. Every strand is simulated. There is no undo.

  • Android · iPhone · iPad
  • No ads
  • Plays offline

Taped to the mirror

What’s in the chair

  1. Mid-cut: the clippers on a #1 at his temple, one side of a curly head faded, clippings on the cape

    The chair

    Real hair, no undo

    Clippers with guards #0 to #6, shears, thinning shears, a straight razor and a comb. Every strand is simulated, and hair only gets shorter.

  2. The order pad: a low skin fade, an inch and a quarter on top, line me up, with photos of the cut front and back

    The order

    He mumbles. You cut.

    Every walk-in tells you what he wants in a muted-trombone wah-wah. Luckily he brought photos, taped to the order pad.

  3. The mirror: he looks at the back of his head, where the hair still long glows amber, and asks: bit long at the back?

    The mirror

    Missed a bit?

    Hit Done and he has a long look at himself. If something’s still long he’ll point at it, and you get one touch-up.

  4. The verdict: before and after photos, five stars, a fifteen dollar tip and a review: crisp enough to slice bread

    The verdict

    Stars, tips and reviews

    A before and after, a tip by the stars, and a review he will never, ever take down. Share the best ones. Or the worst.

  5. Surprise me: four styles pictured on him, from a subtle low taper to a bold buzz cut

    Walk-ins

    Surprise me

    Some walk-ins leave it all to you. The bolder the change, the bigger the tip. If you pull it off.

  6. Training on Manny, the shop’s mannequin: step 1 of 9, shears, leave an inch, with the hair to cut glowing

    Barber school

    Practise on Manny

    The shop’s mannequin doesn’t flinch, blink or tip. The pro walks you through every cut, step by step, and does one side for you to copy.

  7. The shop from across the street: a red-brick walk-up, the barber pole, and the sign over the window saying BAD BARBER

    The street

    A day at the shop

    Nine to six on the clock, walk-ins on the bench, a hot streak for happy customers, a goal every day, and a tip jar that buys things for the shop. And a cat.

Out front

The sign keeps up

Every cut earns XP. Start out as a Bad Barber and the sign over the window says so. Rank up and somebody fixes it. Badly, at first.

On the bench

The regulars

Walk-ins from all over the city, and the regulars, who warm up to you with good cuts, tip more, and send their friends. Some of them come with extras.

Kris: a shaved head, thin black rectangular glasses and a very long ginger beardKris

Kris

Hasn’t seen his own chin since 2016. Wants the cheek line sharp, the neck clean, and the length left exactly where it is. He keeps all sorts in there.

“Just a tidy-up. Don’t go digging.”

Christian: a huge toothy grin, big round eyes, ears that stick out and a short dark beardChristian

Christian

Laughs at his own jokes before he gets to the end of them. Asks for a mohawk, a skullet or nothing at all, and tips like it’s your birthday.

“Got one for you. Ask me.”

…and Sal, Marcus, Jun and the rest of the bench, who’d all like a word.

Ask the barber

Questions from the bench

The things people ask while they wait. Mostly about the undo button.

Is Bad Barber free?

Yes. It’s free on the App Store and Google Play, with no ads and no in-app purchases. The only tips in the game are the ones your customers leave.

What can I play it on?

iPhone, iPad and Android. On an iPad his head stays the same size and you see more of the shop.

Can I undo a bad cut?

No. Every strand is simulated and hair only gets shorter, so once it’s off, it’s off. You do get one touch-up when he checks himself in the mirror.

What tools do I get?

Clippers with guards #0 to #6, shears, thinning shears, a straight razor and a comb, then a spray bottle and a blow dryer to finish.

How do I get better at it?

Barber school. Practise any cut on Manny, the shop’s mannequin: the pro talks you through it step by step and does one side for you to copy. Customers ask for harder cuts as you rank up, from Bad Barber all the way to Legendary.

Does it need the internet?

No. It never goes online and collects nothing, and your career stays on your phone. The privacy policy says so in more words.

Walk-ins welcome.

No ads · No in-app purchases · Plays offline